I think I need help . As stupid as it sounds , I really don’t know what should I do with my life right now anymore . I am tired of faking a smile , tempted to go back to my ‘addictions’ , I just want to sleep the day away , ignore everything , Constantly upset , feeling unwanted , unloved .. Just include everything I’ve just said which the picture below .
I mean , could this actually happen… To me ?……..
I thought about it right after posting my previous post , could I somehow get … Um depression …..?
I thought that maybe I could see a physiatrist , I am really against counsellors . Period . They’re like the same but … Different . I want someone who could listen to me get insane and at the same time comforts me with his/her presence .
Maybe I’m just thinking too much .
Noone cares , not even my parents . So I guess I am gonna stuck here in this Oh-so-Happy phrase forever .
And to those fucker that thinks I’m seeking for attention, a big FUCK YOU Shoutout yeah? It’s because of people like you that’s why feelings and emotion like these exist . Fuckheads .
But on a calmer note ,
I just wish my parents would have read my blog , things I never ever could say to them because they might think I’m even more insane than I already am .
I wish they had believe me even though I am just 17 just because .
Just because whatever I say with my mouth never makes sense with their old fashion mindset/thinking . Perks of being me I guess….
Or maybe it’s just sadness , sadness since I was 10 .
I’m so confused I’m crying wtf .
Or maybe I’m just fine and I’m just over thinking .